I Am Six

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I am six
And I am gone
And all I can leave behind.
Are my words
And the echo trails of songs
That I sang
In church with grandma,
On my favorite swing,
That used to guide  the tips my shoes to the sky,
Or in my room where 
I always danced
To grown up songs
That I knew were about love.


I am six
And I am gone.
And I take with me the only shadow
That I have never known
Which will never grow
Into the image of a man.

I am six
And I am gone
And I will never ride the Sky Trail Monorail
At Gilroy Gardens
Again
Or Bugly the Goldfish
Or the duck shaped paddle boats
Which I used to stand up on
And yell
Look at me, mommy!
Look at me!
While my mom and dad
Would beam back
Like a pair of lighthouses
Who would never let me become
Lost at sea.

I am six 
And I am gone.
And I will never go to
Christmas Hill Park again
Where I used to ride my bike to the moon
And kick goals
And have picnics on the damp grass blanket
Where we celebrated
Birthdays 
And happy things 
Like losing a tooth
And took full belly naps
Until the sun sank like a heavy heart
And the silky coolness of the 
Afternoon would wake us up
And tell us that 
It was time to go home.

I am six
And I am gone.
I was killed
For no reason
Other than the fact
That I was there.
I was shot
Like a cub
Or a fawn
Or a young soldier
By a stranger
And I was gone
Before I fell to the ground.

I will be remembered by few, 
forgotten by most
And be forever known
As the six year old 
Who died at the Gilroy Garlic Festival
Until the next shooting comes
And the one after that
And the one after that.

Because nothing changes
Because you care more about
Unborn babies
Than you do living children
Who you refuse
To protect,
Your life will go on
Uninterrupted
You will get to drive cars
And follow your dreams with their made up instructions 
And marry pretty girls or boys
And have children like me
Who will never be safe
As long as you are in charge.

I am six
And I am gone
And I am no longer afraid
Or hurt
And I feel no pain.
And I will wait 
For mommy and daddy
To come pick me up
Just like I did
At the end of a school day
When I would watch the road
And wait
For them to arrive.














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